A Time and a Season for Everything

I wanted to write this post to remind myself how much God is working in my life. 

I have been so ungrateful and in a way its hard not to be. I am only human. ;)

Let me explain our situation here at home. Although all these do not sound bad, it really wears on me most the time. I can't help but think how much more comfortable and "happy" I could be if some of these things were just fixed. 

First of all, we have a nice size 2-story 2 bedrooms, 1.5 bathroom town home. There is a small patio out by the larger bedroom and the living area upstairs has a fireplace and nice high ceilings to make it feel even larger. We pay a pretty good price to live in this place. better than most places actually. 

When Ben and I first moved in January 2010(before children) it was really quite nice. Even when we had our son Josiah the next year it was nice.

When Eden was born early last year we still were pretty good with the size. Newborns don't take up much room and sleep through just about anything. 

Now my children are older. Eden will be one next month and Josiah three and I have to say that the place is feeling a little cramped. 

Josiah sleeps in his bedroom and Eden sleeps in ours. Unfortunately Eden will not sleep in the room with us. The only way that she will sleep through the night is if she is by herself. I don't know why she wakes up all the time with us in there with her. I think she senses us in there and so results in waking every 1-2 hours. This goes the same for her sleeping in her brothers room with him. She wakes him up and then I have two children up in the middle of the night. Josiah goes back to sleep right away....sometimes.

Because of this Ben and I sleep upstairs. 

It's getting old. 

We have a nice pillow top king-size bed downstairs and we can't even sleep in it.

Sleeping upstairs isn't too bad, but I can't help but miss my something better downstairs. 

God has really been working on me through this. Maybe he is working to make me better, more grateful. There are people that live in much small situations and I am complaining about sleeping upstairs?

Yeah, I need(ed) a heart change. 

I was so fixin to get out of this place that I wasn't concentrating on how it was going to affect us in the long run. If we were to move out to something a little larger, a three bedroom perhaps, that would take us even longer to get out of the debt that we are in. I mean, we really want to buy a house someday and I don't want to be in my 40s buying our first home. 

Ever since Ben got his new job we have been able to make larger payments. Its been nice to get a bill in the mail and see it much lower than the previous bill. Of course just like any other family things set us back. Paying for our cars tires to be fixed and replaced wasn't exactly cheap.

Before having my heart change, I was really looking forward to getting a nice chunk back for taxes and putting most all of it towards debt so that we can move out. We have a couple things we need to take care of before tossing it all towards the money we owe. Like getting Ben's record expunged and we need to get a larger car seat for Eden. 

All i was focused on was getting out of here. It really wasn't all that bad, but in my mind it was bad. Instead of making my house more of a home for my family, I put it aside with my mind thinking that we were going to leave soon anyway. What was the point in organizing, deep cleaning, storing baby clothes and Christmas decor out of site if we were going to move into something bigger? I even put off decorating and painting for the fact that we weren't going to be here long. 

Here is where God was working on my mind and my heart:

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10  

Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. Colossians 4:2

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

These scriptures keep playing over and over again in my head. Reminding me that God is in control and I need to trust Him.

After all this I feel better now. I was talking to my husband in the car yesterday how I don't feel so rushed to move. Maybe it is the right thing to stay where we are at. I need to do my job as a wife to make our house a home. I need to put my creative self to use.

Eden sleeping in our room won't be forever. Eventually she will get older and will be able to sleep in her brothers room. Josiah will get older and be able to sleep through his sisters small random whining through the night. 

We won't always be in debt and if we stay where we are at our debt will be gone much quicker. 

We can save for a down payment to buy house much quicker and won't have debt to hold us down.

**Sigh** To be debt-free?! I really am looking forward to that day!

PS, We also decided to home school Josiah, so now I REALLY need to be creative with my organizing!

Follow me on Instagram jessicamommy22 for updates on organizing, the kids and our life!

  Love, 

Jess